According to lead singer Lizzie Spotts, the Features section of the Cracked Pot was always destined for greater things. “Well,” she explained, “we all love head-banging and whining and/or screaming for extensions on our deadlines and/or coffee. We’re also unbelievably talented at wearing all-black, applying loads of eyeliner, and sulking when we do not get extensions on deadlines. After all, who better to form a group full of dissatisfied, apathetic, and depressed people than a few e-zine staff writers?”
Indeed, the Features always find extraordinary inspiration in their fluid, almost-poetic lyrics. Their debut album, titled, “The Applications” featured songs such as, “Why Did I Sign Up?,” “Dante’s Tenth Circle of Hell,” “My Editor Drives Me Crazy,” and “Every Breath You Take (Your Editor Will Be Watching You).” Currently, they are working devotedly at their sophomoric album. According to drummer Maxwell Moser, “I feel that we’ve matured as a band and a Features section quite a bit.” This new album already has two new hit singles out – “Stairway to Coffee” and “We Are the Writers.” Their third single, “Homeschool California,” has been recalled from the radios indefinitely, and Moser would not comment as to whether it would appear on the album.
But who are the band members, and how did they get their roles in this epic band? Features editor Lizzie Spotts explains. “Well, I’ve always sung along to bands in the shower most enthusiastically, and I feel like if my showerhead were alive, it would have applauded me. My hairbrush was similarly impressed, I feel, and so I felt inspired to sing lead in this heavy metal band. After all, all you have to do to be the lead singer in this band is scream (not a difficult thing for an editor) and make angry motions with your fists and/or head.”
Moser, according to Lizzie, “was forever drumming his fingers during staff meetings, driving us all insane.” Margot Brose and Megan Holiday are both incredibly apt at Guitar Hero, and as such are the current guitar players. Andrew Pachulski plays bass guitar, because “he has a deep voice.” MaryLynn Kemp and Rebekah Curry sing backup because they are “the people who kind of hang around in the background, but are utterly essential to our section as brilliant writers.” Jessica New plays the keyboard, as she has a habit of adding in a random note or two in meetings. And, last but not least, Meredith King plays the tambourine, as she always adds an extra beat or perspective.
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